Sometimes ignorance really is bliss

Last night Ray surprised me with a dinner out with friends for my birthday!  It was a really great night and I had so much fun with some of my closest friends.  And I was actually really surprised- I had no idea we were even going out to dinner until my mom just randomly showed up (which doesn't happen regularly because she lives just over an hour away).

It's kind of a big birthday coming up this Saturday and although I didn't count the candles, I'm pretty sure based on how my cake looked like it was on fire, that the count was accurate LOL

While getting ready I contemplated wearing my wig, but I don't really feel very comfortable in it- it feels like I'm lying.  Although it's a very good match to my hair, I feel like people will be able to tell it's a wig, so I prefer to go without.  I'm not a big make-up wearing person, so imagine my surprise when I went to put on my mascara and realized that I don't have eyelashes in the corners of my eyes! 

 This is where ignorance is bliss :P  I can't lie, it made me pretty sad when I realized this.  I'm happy that my eyebrows, although have thinned, haven't completely disappeared. They've definitely thinned on the outer edges, which is pretty random. I'm hoping they stick around for the rest of my treatments.  

This isn't really how I planned to spend my 40th birthday- bald and fat.  But it is what it is and I'm doing my best to not be depressed about it.  This was going to be my year to get fit but cancer had other ideas. I will be starting a new decade of my life fighting and I'm okay with that.

So the new plan is "fit for 41" LOL  I'm considering starting another blog once I finish chemo dedicated to getting healthy again (and hopefully losing weight too).  stay tuned!